Most mediators are trained in process. I am trained in process and in people, and the combination is what makes the difference in the room.

Mediation that holds is not just procedurally competent. It is psychologically informed, built on a genuine understanding of how people think, feel, and behave under the specific pressure that conflict and separation create. It is trauma-informed, because separation and conflict are not logistical problems with emotional side-effects. They are, for most people, among the most destabilising experiences of their lives. And it is child-centred, because in every family dispute, the people with the least power and the most at stake are the ones who are not in the room.

I came to mediation through my work as an Emotionally Focused counsellor with children, individuals, and families experiencing grief, loss, and separation. Before that, twenty years of working with people in the most exposed moments of their lives.

Each of those things, in different ways, was preparation for this work. I understand what it costs a person to sit across from someone they once loved, or once trusted, and now feel very differently about, and what that emotional turmoil does to the capacity to reach an agreement. I understand what fear does to language, what grief does to negotiation, and what it takes to create enough safety that something real can happen in the room. That understanding is not incidental to this work. It is the work.